A tale of betrayal

Underneath burnout, rust out, grief, blocked creativity, and resistance to change is betrayal.

Clinically, betrayal is “the sense of being harmed by the intentional actions or omissions of a trusted person.”

Even in that brief definition, betrayal feels heavy. Let’s break it down:

  • There’s a felt sensation - the embodiment of betrayal, how you feel it in your body.

  • Trust (and the breaking of that trust) is involved.

  • The action or omission is intentional – whether it’s done to you or you do it yourself, whether it’s kept from you or you keep it from yourself.

We are living within systems of extraction where productive output matters most and regularly require that we betray ourselves and our wellbeing. Even institutions and organizations that claim to prioritize wellness and care perpetuate the disconnect from others/the world, distractions from crises, mind-body disconnect, overworking, and overconsumption. Many of us experience burnout and rustout as a chronic lifestyle.

For me, this meant betrayal of my body, career, and relationships. And the biggest betrayal in all of that was my own self-betrayal that opened the door to the rest.

How do you learn to resist the systemic when you’ve been trained to self-betray?

How do you learn to trust yourself when the trusted person who betrayed you is you?

I know that a pathway forward out of all of this betrayal is:

  • Relearning how to connect with and listen to your body safely and compassionately

  • Rebuilding trust through believing your body and setting supportive boundaries

  • Reframing the when and why of taking action so that your actions align with your values

  • Reclaiming the truth that lives within ourselves and Earth

This is the work we do in Reclaim You.

Reclaim You is an interactive group coaching program I created as a recovering overer for my fellow overers, who know self-betrayal well.

Together we’ll explore how to interrupt patterns of self-betrayal and to work and live more intentionally and slowly within a capitalistic system.

You’ll figure out what you’re done tolerating and where you are ready to take the pathway towards wholeness that is embodied, trustworthy, action-oriented, and honest. Over the 9 weeks, you’ll learn how to unravel the belief that your worthiness is tied to your production, identity, and career.

Tamara Yakaboski