As we head into this last week of November, I wanted to offer a short reflection on the last two months of Awakening Resilience newsletters. We’ve covered a lot of good practices including many that might benefit you with any friends and family time you have scheduled this week. 

A TL;DR of practices and insights you can catch up on, or file for later.

The work you’ve been doing to protect your energy in group spaces has been about reclaiming agency over how you show up at work, which is a core part of your career identity.

Think of the classic work–life balance Venn diagram: two circles, one for work and one for life, with a small overlap. In most organizations, the “work” circle can feel like a separate world that dictates energy, time, and identity (often over your other circles). You either absorb the stress and dynamics of the workplace, or you retreat and compartmentalize. Neither circle truly reflects who you are or the life you want to live.

The Whole Sun Shining Model flips that.

One of the most regular questions I hear is: “Should I stay or should I go?”

After noticing how group dynamics and emotional contagions affect your energy, and reflecting on the stories you tell yourself about your work, you may find yourself asking: Is this role still serving me? Am I still serving it and others through it?

Before making any big decisions, start with subtle, grounded observation, without rushing to conclusions or drastic changes.

One of the questions I was asked back in October was wondering where to start. Because often, all those previous contagions I talked about last week have been building on top of each other, preventing any chance that you can see the root of the weed that needs to be yanked out.

You’re in luck, because as a master gardener, I can spot the weeds in the beautiful garden of your life and work fast.

How about let’s start here, my dear friend…

We all contribute to a team’s vibe: its productivity, cohesion, creativity, and collaboration. Yet unchecked emotions, subtle body language, and the stories we carry can ripple through a group, sabotaging the very connection we want to build.

Here’s how common workplace contagions show up and how Resilient Teams helps your team respond instead of react:

Frustration turns to Rage if unaddressed over time

As you know, I work 1:1 with folks, in organizations as a trainer and consultant, and in my community with climate work. All to say, I see a lot of different types of groups. Yet over and over, I witness individuals and groups craving meaningful connection but lacking the foundational skill set to actually be in community together. It breaks my heart to see people want something yet sabotage it at the same time.

True resilience has never been about bouncing back. It is about moving forward together.

“I’m so proud of the turnaround and the performance the team has demonstrated in the last year. It feels more transparent and more positive. People are definitely giving each other grace and having open conversations when things come up… conflict resolution is definitely improved.” - Sylvia, Manager

Teams that thrive under change create space to innovate, connect, and act with intention. Here’s what I observed in my work with teams in a biotech company when we started last year:

We’ve been talking this month about unchecked behaviors from others (and sometimes ourselves) causing anxiety rises, rage simmers, and suddenly the whole group feels tighter, tenser, more guarded. I want to connect it all back to boundaries.

Boundaries are living practices of protection and connection.

Someone hurries into your office, or pulls you into theirs, or sideline chats online with you while the meeting is happening. That’s what I call the “meeting after the meeting” - aka backchanneling. It’s the unofficial space where disagreements, perceived slights, or confusion get hashed over and over. Yet not addressed where they matter most: in the room, during the meeting itself, or to the person actually involved.

It’s the surge of frustrations that started well before that moment. In organizational terms, backchanneling is often fueled by frustration that hasn’t been addressed in the right space.

Have your practices of observation this month left you feeling a bit raw and exposed because you’re starting to see patterns and dynamics more clearly? 

In those observations, you’ve likely felt massive frustration–yours, others', everybody's. Rage is everywhere these days, for many good reasons. And also some dangerous, unchecked ones.

Rage is complex. Have you let yourself feel its wisdom?

A year after participating in Resilient Teams, Mindy was still applying the tools in her day-to-day work and seeing the impact.

The company she worked for had undergone a major transition: two departments merged, leadership roles were in flux, and colleagues were frustrated. Some were openly talking about leaving, while others were resentful or disengaged. The energy in her meetings was tense. Generally, she felt focused on making the best of the situation, but she was struggling with how to navigate the negative contagion.

You walk into a regular meeting feeling fairly neutral. Or maybe you enter already feeling a little annoyed. Within minutes, your body tightens.

Your body is the first to register: one person sighs heavily, another crosses their arms, maybe there’s a slight eyeroll or smirk. There’s hustle energy churning. It’s got the vibe of more, faster, do it yesterday. If you just worked harder, rested faster, got more ticked off your list.

No one says outright that something’s wrong, but tension is thick.